6WS Special Edition : Sam ♥♥

My baby boy is now 12.

I walked into my room and found Sam sleeping with my elephant, Dizzy, and had to take this shot.  He turned 12 this month and I am so blessed and grateful to have him.  I adopted him when he was 3 years old from the shelter and, although at the time I had planned on getting a puppy, the minute I saw him on the humane society’s website I had to meet him.  I had to go through two interviews and meet him three times because he was a “special adoptable” due to his severe separation anxiety and panic attacks; his owners would go away for days and leave him on his own.  They ended up abandoning him because they bought a new house and he made a mess during one of their extended absences.  When I adopted him, he was sad and scared, but he still reached out to me and loved me.  At that time, he wouldn’t let me out of his sight.  If I went outside without him, he cried and had an accident.  Today Sam is independent and happy and people are shocked when they find out he’s old, lol.  Because of his energy and his personality, they think he’s a puppy.  The best thing people say to me is, “He’s such a happy dog!”  (Well, that and when they talk about how cute he is, because I know I’m totally biased, but I think he’s off-the-charts adorable, lol.)

Sam is a light in my life and brings me joy every. single. day.

Thank you, Sam, for being my furry child.  Thank you for being you.

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Symptom

My fat is a symptom of my loss of safety.  My binge-eating is a symptom of my chronic emptiness.  My scars are a symptom of my inability to regulate my self-hatred and extreme emotions.  My anxiety is a symptom of my fear of both the known and unknown.  My nightmares are a symptom of the abuse and terror I have experienced.

I am lost and I am shattered, but I am not over.

The fact that I am still alive is a symptom of my strength and hope that I can still get better.

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